Different People Handle Different Things Differently
by Levi Collins
Summary: An unfortunate event happens within Reid's personal life and he does his best to get through it with as little pain occurring as possible. He makes a few bad decisions along the way though.


((Hey guys, I'm writing this on my phone so I apologize if it isn't the greatest.))

The team had just returned to Base after a pretty simple case in Texas, the only reason they were at all drained was because so many people were asking them "Why? How?" Etc. So they found themselves having to explain the same thing over and over again which can get pretty annoying, except Reid seemed to have an okay time with it. He immersed himself so much in informing these people that he shut off his phone so he wouldn't be distracted or disrupted.

When he stepped into the office though he was turning on his phone only for it to flash the fact that he had several missed calls. He actually wasn't expecting anyone to call him at all so this came as a shock to him. Morgan was just stretching and greeting Garcia who had something "juicy" to talk about, Reid tuned them out as he returned a call to the number who had called him multiple times.

The next thing the team knew was that Reid broke down. They weren't even paying attention to him but suddenly he dropped to his knees and began sobbing into his hands; his whole body seemed to be shaking. At first all they could do was widen their eyes at the scene before them, but soon everyone but Hotch went to his side to try and figure out what on earth happened.

While everyone was surrounding Reid and not getting a response from him, Hotch went towards Reid's abandoned phone and picked it up. It was still actually in the call so Reid hadn't even hung up before he broke down crying. "Hello?" Hotch said into the phone in a slightly hushed tone.

Hotch and the voice on the other end of the phone exchanged a few words and suddenly his own eyes widened again at hearing the news. He turned to Reid and then nearly snapped at everyone else "Move back and give him some room." He ordered. Everyone was taken by surprise when Hotch spoke up and ordered them to do something so it took them a few seconds to process the command before actually doing so.

When they moved back Hotch ignored his own orders and moved in to whisper something to Reid. Everyone else was shocked and curious to find out what the hell happened but they knew with the current atmosphere that they shouldn't ask. "Reid, go home for a few days and take care of things." Hotch instructed quietly; Reid could hardly hear him over his cries buy tried his best to try and calm himself down a bit.

Reid didn't know what happened next because the next thing he knew he was in his bed at home, staring at the ceiling and trying not to think of his mothers death. It was the one thing that he knew he couldn't handle and that he knew he couldn't prepare himself for. It was the one thing he never wanted to happen and here it was, happening. He tried his best not to think about it because he knew it would make him cry again, however every so often he would start breathing fast and his chest would tighten because the thought just crept back into his head without warning. His eyes stung from crying and resisting the urge to cry, they were probably red and puffy by now but that was the last thing he was concerned about.

So many thoughts rushed through his head, but they didn't stay long before he tried to get rid of them again. Things like, why did he turn off his phone? Maybe he could have helped. Even if he couldn't of helped the thought of him putting work before the wellbeing of his mother made him feel like the worlds worst son. Maybe if he stayed with his mother he could have helped in some way. Maybe if he didn't put her away she could have lived a happier life. Was this his fault? Did he take her life away from her? Did she...did she resent him because of that?

Thinking back to it he only confirmed that there was no way should could have forgiven him. He was the reason his father left, the reason his mother went even more downhill and the reason she didn't like a free life until the very end. Of course she would be upset with him. He shut his eyes for what seemed like the first time in hours. His chest wouldn't untighten and his tears began streaming down his cheeks again. "I could have done better." He thought to himself; over and over again. All he could do was repeat that sentence in his head and every time he did it made him feel worse and worse.

Then his phone rang, breaking through his thoughts and bringing him back to the real world. Did he want to answer it? Last time he didn't answer it it didn't end too well...but he sure as hell didn't feel like talking to anyone like this. If it was his team then he had nothing to talk to them about and if it was about his mother...well he didn't want to talk about that either. Why did they expect him to organize a funeral right after finding out the news? Who would be up for that after hearing such a thing, in fact; who would be up for it at all? It was kind of selfish of them to ask him to form a funeral for the only person who was there for him as a child!

"But it was kind of selfish to never visit her as well."

Why? Why did that thought need to buzz through his head? Out of all the thoughts; that one rang the loudest. He would've cried but all of his tears had already been shed. Or maybe it was because he always knew this to be true. Maybe he didn't cry because, this had always been a thought in his head and he had become used to the fact that he was the selfish one.

Without giving it another thought, he picked up the phone. Anything would be better than being left alone with his own thoughts right now. "Hello?" He spoke into the phone softly. His voice came off as so soft and lost that he began to wonder if the other person had even heard him at all.

"Spencer Reid?" The voice said on the other line "This is Jonathan Fisher, I'm sorry about your loss." He said back.

Reid shook his head "No, not this, not now." He thought to himself, he didn't want anyone to talk to him about that. He didn't want anyone to talk to him about his mother.

"I'm here to help you organize the funeral, I know it can be hard for family members, for anyone, to have to do this for someone they cared about. I'm here to make the process easier for you."

Reid looked to the wall in his room, he didn't want to talk about that but...he knew he should accept his services. This guy could make things easier for him and maybe Reid could get over this faster. All he wanted to do at this point was forget.

"Yeah, that'd be great." He mumbled into the phone, raking back his hair with his fingers. The sooner he could get back to work and keep himself busy the better.

Everyone's eyes were on Reid, it didn't take long for them all to figure out what had happened to him so they knew about his mother; however they did not know why the hell he was at work. They were sitting at their desks doing their own work of course, but it didn't take a genius to feel the tension in the room or to notice them practically staring at Reid every few seconds. How did he go from a bawling mess to...this? It was strange but they didn't know what to do about this touchy topic. They wanted to tell Reid that he shouldn't be here and that he should go home or something to help get through this, but how were they supposed to tell him?

Morgan came into the room after leaving to go talk to Garcia and the first thing he noticed was Reid sitting at his desk and doing his work. At first Morgan just stood there, not really knowing what to say. But after a few moments he let out a sigh and walked towards Reid; he needed to tell the kid that this isn't how he needed to deal with his problems. Before he got to Reid though, Prentiss stood up "Morgan, can I see you over here? I need your help with something." She practically yelled, catching almost everyone off guard.

Reid looked to her for a few seconds before returning his attention to his work and everyone let out a relieved sigh. Morgan just clicked his tongue and walked over to Prentiss who took him to the coffee room. "Morgan you can't be insensitive about this topic!" She whisper screamed at him.

Morgan rolled his eyes "I'm not being insensitive, I didn't even open my mouth yet before you called me over."

"It's not something he wants to talk about away all right now."

"Well we can't just let him pretend like it didn't happen, if we let him do that then it'll just prolong the suffering on his end. Besides; if he doesn't take care of this thing now he's just going to hate himself for it later."

Prentiss looked down to the floor, Morgan was right. She didn't want to admit it - so she didn't - but Morgan was right. "We still have to approach it delicately tho-"

She was interrupted when she looked towards the door and saw Reid walking in, this was probably the worst place to discuss something about Reid that they didn't want him to hear about because he practically lived next to this coffee machine. It was obvious that they both were struggling for words to say to Reid so he just decided to beat them to it "I'm fine." He said softly before going straight for the coffee machine.

"Look kid, I know you want to pretend like this all hasn't happened because you think it will protect yourself; but it won't." Morgan placed a hand on Reid's shoulder while he prepared his coffee.

"I'm planning the funeral already, I don't think that's the same as pretending that it didn't happen. I just don't want to miss work." Reid defended himself.

"Maybe it's best that you do though, so you can clear your head and-" Prentiss got cut off by Reid.

"Going home to immerse myself into details about my mothers death will not help me 'clear my head'." He nearly snapped at her, grabbing his cup of coffee and sipping from it to shut himself up before he said something he regretted. "I'm fine guys, I'm dealing with everything rationally." And then he walked back to his desk.

Rossi and Hotch were watching everyone from Hotch's office, something was wrong and they knew it. "Is it okay to let him work?" Rossi asked Hotch while they stood next to the window in Hotch's office. Hotch would be lying if he said he didn't want to step in and help Reid, but he also knew that that wasn't going to help Reid get over his issue. "I think it's fine to let Reid try and figure out what he wants to do, if I feel like he's in danger then I will step it." Hotch explained.

Rossi looked at his team mate with a confused look on his face "Danger? Why would here in danger?" He asked.

"Death of a loved one can be very upsetting, for some it's too much. I just hope it's not too much for Reid."

"Well yeah but you said it like you had something specific in mind."

"...Are you familiar with the drug Dilaudid?"

"Not really-"

"Reid is."

((I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, more will come soon.))


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